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November 15, 2006



I can't BELIEVE you have a fantasy football team!!
ok---choking, and joking aside...
I agree with your assertion-
in the time that I have worked at my job, I have noticed that the guys I work with have to have an organized activity to bring them all together in order to all hang out outside of work--other wise I guess it's weird or something...whereas I made 2 of my best friends at work and I don't know that we ever had specific plans---let's just hang out :)
Fellowship means different things to different people, men and women-
I think it's awesome that Steve has found what fellowship means to him and his friends and they can grow in that.
As for GodMen--I mistrust any organization that sets about to get people "revved up" and admonishes balance---I agree men need to be men, eat red red meat, set off fireworks on days not 4th of July, work on cars, but all guys are not going to respond to that kind of thing...The GodMen are based out of Nashville, though, which is a note that cannot be overlooked-Nashville is famous for it's grandious productions ala LA style to reach folks, without thinking of the long-term everyday. It's the Disneyland approach--give them a magical day of high and then send them back to consumerland to keep buying the product (sorry--did I say that out loud?)


Nonsense! It may appeal to some people but not me, not most of the men I know. It's not a slick production full of testosterone we want, we get that all the time, on the golf course, at football games etc.
No, when men say the church is for sissies we are saying that it's not real, its not a safe place to express how we really feel. It doesn't reflect who we are and what we struggle with.
Some may say its been feminized but that's a really sexist comment. What's really happened is we have cheapened the gospel into self-help. That's not feminizing the gospel, that's changing the gospel. Men and women alike, will respond to the real gospel, but men will be the first to run a mile from touchy feely self help therapy.


Fantasy football is indeed addictive -- I've been a member of two leagues for a number of years (this is my tenth season in one of them), and I still love it. The only drawback is that I find myself rooting against my favorite teams because their opponent has one or more players in my lineup that week. And when you're boasting a 4-6 record in one league and a 2-8 in the other, the rewards aren't that great.

As far as your final question, I hadn't actually thought about it before. It's a 50-50 deal with me; one the one hand, I love getting out on the golf course and hanging out with some of my guy friends. At other times, I prefer a few beers and some good conversation. Just depends on the mood and our schedules -- and since so many of us have kids now, they are often very impromptu gatherings.

And I can't help but comment on one thing Emy said about guys working on cars -- I definitely don't fall into that category; in fact, I'm lucky I can find the battery. Now, if guys can hang around near a car, then I'm your man!!



I drive a KIA, cars mean nothing to me at all.

Mark Knecht

I don't relate to the article personally, but I suspect it does appeal to a certain segment of men.

I had not thought about the bigger questions before (men and church; men and socializing). But truthfully (and sadly), I believe most men are functioning on a lower level of Maslow's hierarchy than women, namely the survival level. The responsibility for "providing" for family needs has been the domain of men in our culture. This has enabled women to move up a rung (or two) on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. I also think the responsibility of "providing" has a component of "control" that injects itself into men's psyche. Church, a relationship with God, and the act of following Christ is all about giving up control, which is hard for me, and men in general I believe.

Men's need for socializing could be argued similarly. Men have traditionally socialized at work or activities related to work. Men are focused on providing, perhaps with little energy left for socializing. Women are focused on nuturing, which has a major component of "socializing".

Another data point: I recall my college daze when we guys would just get together to talk. After I got married and started working full-time, my desire and need for hanging with the guys -- just to talk-- went down radically. And has remained low ever since.

Thanks for posing this thought provoking question.

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